Logo

My boyfriend won’t tell me his past and it hurts me so I broke up with him what do I do?

07.06.2025 23:45

My boyfriend won’t tell me his past and it hurts me so I broke up with him what do I do?

a) . Figure out what kind of people his current best friends are, figure out the kind of company he keeps (currently), and make the call on that basis.

Here is what this one boils down to — pick one:

This one is harder (I like the harder questions).

What is the process of becoming an Evangelical preacher? Is attending seminary school necessary? How long does it typically take? Is it financially challenging?

What you need to do is this:

Would you want his best friends, and the people he hangs out with, as your next door neighbors for the rest of your life?

A lot of relationship questions on Quora are easy questions to answer.

Was there any slavery of white people that actually compares to the transatlantic slave trade? I’m not baiting or anything actually genuinely curious and want to know.

So I need more information — Can you paint a larger, more detailed picture in the comment box below?

2 — You have a bad apple who not only has a bad or checkered past, but he hasn’t fundamentally changed, he’s the same bad apple he always was, and doesn’t want you to figure that out.

1 — You have a keeper of guy who has a bad or checkered past, but he’s repented, and he’s working hard to turn over a new leaf — but he’s still too ashamed of his past to talk about it.

I’m wondering about attachment and transference with the therapist and the idea of escape and fantasy? How much do you think your strong feelings, constant thoughts, desires to be with your therapist are a way to escape from your present life? I wonder if the transference serves another purpose than to show us our wounds and/or past experiences, but is a present coping strategy for managing what we don’t want to face (even if unconsciously) in the present—-current relationships, life circumstances, etc. Can anyone relate to this concept of escape in relation to their therapy relationship? How does this play out for you?

b) . How does he treat other people of lower status than him? . . . How does he treat the persons he doesn’t yet know very well? . . . How does he treat the check-out clerks, the gas station attendants, the bums and homeless people on the streets? . . . How does he treat stray dogs and cats? . . . Will he go out of his way to help someone he doesn’t know? . . . Is he quick to anger and curse, or slow to do so? . . . Can he hold a job for months & years without upsetting his co-workers or bosses or clientele? . . . Does he pay his bills on time? . . . Does he run up credit card debt and have bill collectors after him? . . . What does your mother and sisters think of him? . . . Does he have good manners on the phone? . . . Other than his past (before he met you), is he easy-going and easy-to-talk-to about everything else? . . . If he ran a business, would you recommend your best friends to do business with him? . . . Does he have some emergency savings? . . . Does he mow his yard, wash his car, go to the dentist as needed, and take his pets to the vet as needed? . . . Does he spend too much money on beer, alcohol, weed, lottery tickets, sports betting, cigarettes, porn, or other junk?

— Please feel free to respond with follow-up questions in the comment box immediately below, thanks.